"Some people take often as personal criticism, aspects of human behavior rejected by common sense, which, in casual conversation, someone simply raise the purposes of observation or questioning himself"
We complain often difficult to engage in a dialogue with certain people because everything we say is misunderstood, which can trigger disruptions or even harsh discussions. The more we try to explain, more confusion.
The communication does not occur directly, as is sometimes supposed, that is, on one side a transmitter, a receiver of another, simply by a common language for the message to be decoded. Besides language, many other conditions are involved in the production of meaning between interlocutors.
Therefore, I receive and interpret the speech of others not only from shared knowledge, or my ideological position, or the memory of other rational senses aroused say that. Enter also the sensations stored relating to mental and emotional conditions of the individual, which are mobilized by what others say.
Some people take often as personal criticism, aspects of human behavior rejected by common sense, which, in casual conversation, someone simply raise the purposes of observation or questioning itself. What would lead a person to feel the constant target of what other people? What makes you think that all the other negative says she wants to refer?
On the one hand we find insecurity, on the other, or the same, there is some selfishness in this behavior.
The uncertainty may result from a subject's history marked by rejection of his family circle and others linked to the idea of ??right and wrong and thus sin and guilt, which contributed to undermining their self-esteem. Thus, he always expects people around you continue looking at what, in his view, it is worse. Even when the speech of another it is not addressed directly, it makes its way into this unsafe condition.
It's insecure, too, that this subject is centered in himself, as if he needed all the time, defend himself from any charge. Within this framework, it offers few opportunities to exchange, so communication is truncated, because every time feels reached during the dialogue, he stops to defend itself, justified, or at least make sure that the other is or not referring to it. And so it is not possible to deepen or broaden the conversation.
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